Kwibuka

How Rwanda Taught Me the Meaning of Forgiveness

I woke up thinking about Rwanda, a place I used to call home and to some extent, I still do.  April 7 marked twenty two years after the Genocide against the Tutsi in 1994. Almost one million people were brutally murdered in that small landlocked country in the heart of Africa. To this day when I share my story about living in Rwanda, most people either seem bewildered or terrified. Quite honestly, I never felt scared to live in Rwanda. In fact, I think of this country not as the Land of a Thousand Hills, but the Land of a Thousand Smiles. I felt an overwhelming sense of generosity and respect unlike anywhere I've ever felt before. Kwibuka meaning, to remember, in Kinyarwanda, is the nation's theme for the commemoration. Not only do Rwandans come together to remember, but they focus on unity and renewal for a better life, a more peaceful life. The progress that Rwanda has undergone since 1994 is unparalleled to anything I've ever witnessed. It's truly remarkable the sense of community that I felt when living in the the country. For example, every last Saturday of the month people gather to perform umuganda, or community service. Neighbors help out in their communities, build homes, and clean the streets (Kigali is known to be the cleanest African capital). I was in awe of the level of peace that I felt in the country and I often wondered, "how?" How could a post-genocide nation achieve this level of peace in such a short time span?  There could be a number of viable answers, but one that always comes to mind is forgiveness.

Webster's dictionary defines forgiveness as, "to stop feeling anger toward someone for doing something wrong."  But it's much more than that. It's about the willingness to achieve inner peace despite past circumstances and external factors. Forgiveness doesn't mean condoning someone else's behavior or giving a free pass. It's about being in choice, and choosing to live a life with more freedom and happiness.

Rwanda's people a true testament of the power of forgiveness. These past few days, I've been reading stories of former victims and murderers living side by side in peace. I reflect on the people I've met who have overcome and atrocities beyond imagination.

I'm not implying that hatred or animosity doesn't still exist in Rwanda. I'm sure it does like anywhere else. But the Rwanda I know today is beautiful. Its people are kind, gracious, and respectful. The Rwanda I know is strong. They embrace the present moment and create possibilities that didn't exist before.

I think about my Rwandan friends and family often, and the lessons that they unknowingly shared with me. I never really understood what it meant to forgive until I lived there. I didn't realize that forgiveness meant freedom. For that, I'm forever grateful. As Rwanda embarks on its 100 day mourning period, I'm embarking on 100 days of gratitude for having the privilege to live and work in a place of peace, love, and hope. To the people of Rwanda, you inspire me to be a better human. With all of my heart, Murakoze cyane (thank you).

Top 25 Most Memorable Moments: My Year at the Agahozo-Shalom Youth Village

This past year I spent my time at the Agahozo-Shalom Youth Village in Rwanda as a 2014 Fellow. You may wonder what it exactly means to be a fellow. For many, this idea of volunteering in "Africa" is an escape from the “real world.” Some may even think that I took a year off. Wrong. Having worked since I was 16 years old, I can say with confidence that this has been the most challenging and most important line of work that I have done. No, I did not perform open-heart surgery, but I did work with 500 orphaned and vulnerable teens from the ages of 15-22 years. Stress, emotional trauma, financial constraints, death, power outages, water cuts, disease, and cultural differences are but a few challenges that I have encountered this past year. As I begin to think about the next phase of my life, I realize that I have experienced it all within one year at ASYV. This hasn’t been a year off, rather, as one fellow traveler put it, it has been my “year on.” For the past eleven months, I have done everything from making beds before the new students arrived to greeting the Prime Minister of Norway for the ceremonial opening of the solar field, the first in East Africa, located on ASYV property. Not only did the scope of work vary, but also the intensity of it ranged from chaotic to quiet. I loved every minute it.

As I write this now, I cannot believe that I no longer reside at ASYV. As soon as I left those gates, the whole year is now a collection of memories, experiences, new friendships and family. The ASYV graduates always say that one can never leave Agahozo-Shalom, but Agahozo-Shalom lives within you. They were right. I may be getting on a plane in a few minutes, but I have gained a new home, and more importantly, new family members.

Here is a list of the top 25 most memorable moments as an Agahozo-Shalom Youth Village Fellow:

1. Spending Christmas in Gisenyi. Before the new students arrived, we went to Gisenyi on Lake Kivu for a few days to relax and spend the holiday.

DSC00072

2. Meeting the new students for the first time and becoming part of the Aloysie Inyumba family. Aloysie Inyumba (1962-2012) was the Minister for Gender and Family Promotion up until her death. She was best known for her hard work as an RPF leader during the Genocide Against the Tutsi and her commitment to rebuilding Rwanda. 

3. Celebrating the New Year at the Agahozo-Shalom Youth Village (ASYV) with 128 new kids.

DSC_0152 4. Being told, “When I see you, I love you” from one of the girls in my family.

IMG_9884

5. Discovering $.30 pineapples and $.04 avocados at the local market in Rubona, a short walk from Agahozo-Shalom.

DSC00201

6. Watching the 2nd graduation ceremony for the Class of 2013. As of 2014, ASYV has 240 graduates

7. Laughing with my girls for the first time.

IMG_9486

8. Experiencing the tragic loss of the ASYV Founder and Visionary, Anne Heyman (1961-2014). 

9. Visiting my girls in their actual homes outside ASYV. ASYV staff visit the students during vacation periods to check on them and understand more about their backgrounds.

10. Commemorating 20 Years after the Genocide Against the Tutsi with Agahozo-Shalom students who were born during the Genocide.

11. Hosting the African Development Bank’s First Ladies and Spouses Event at ASYV.

12. Meeting the Prime Minister of Norway, Erna Solberg, at the opening ceremony of the first solar plant in East Africa on ASYV leased property.

ASYV Village Director, Prime Minister of Norway Erna Solberg, and Me

13. Working on the first ASYV fundraising event in Rwanda, Stand & Be Counted Rwanda, which raised almost $100,000. Unfortunately, I didn't make it to the actual event due to an illness in the family!

Photos by Ari Beser, 2014

14. Building my first home out of mud and water for a vulnerable family with the ASYV students through the Tikkun Olam program, Hebrew for “repairing the world.” All students learn the importance of Tikkun Olam and work on various community projects during their time at ASYV (and hopefully after).

15. Attending Village Time, a weekly talent show held every Friday in the Village led by the students.

16. Being a part of the Staff Village Time and debuting in my first parody music video from the Rwandan Urban Boyz' song "Marry Me."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h54rw786SaY

17. Driving through the countryside and seeing this beautiful place, Agahozo-Shalom, set in the rolling hills of Rwanda.

18. Having a picnic with the new grade and going on a boat ride with my family, some of whom it was their first time.

IMG_0738

19. Receiving poems and drawings from the kids and I cherish them more than anything else.

20. Exploring Rwanda and trekking to see the endangered mountain gorillas…AGAIN!

21. Waking up to this view every morning. 

View at Agahozo-Shalom Youth Village

22. Gaining new friends and family.

23. Having the privilege of seeing these smiles everyday.

IMG_9367

24. Saying goodbye (for now) to the girls whom I have grown to love this past year. 

25. Realizing that Rwanda is not just another travel destination. It is home and I certainly will be back again to visit family and friends. 

Aloysie Inyumba Family

The Future of Rwanda and the Faces of the Future

This April marks the 20th anniversary of the 1994 Genocide against the Tutsi in Rwanda where one million people were murdered in a matter of 100 days.  For many ASYV students, it is a traumatic part of their past and they are still healing from the terror that struck their nation, and the world. Even for the students who were born after 1994, the genocide had deep residual effects that touched the lives of all Rwandans. To remember this atrocious offense to humanity, Rwanda has held a series of events called, Kwibuka 20. In Kinyarwanda, kwibuka means "to remember." But Kwibuka is not solely meant to focus on the horror and despair of the genocide; it is meant to unite and bring hope to this small landlocked nation. According to the Kwibuka website, Kwibuka20 calls on the world to stand against genocide in three key ways: to remember, to unite, and to renew. I have lived in Rwanda for only four months now, but I have met some of the most inspiring and wonderful people at Agahozo-Shalom Youth Village. If you ever lose faith in humanity, all you need to do is spend a few minutes at ASYV. The youth that I know and spend everyday with renewed my sense of hope for the world. The genocide in Rwanda was a horrible event in world history and it should not be forgotten, but I want to focus on the future of Rwanda. The future of Rwanda will be determined by its youth. ASYV students range from mid-teens to early twenties and they are leaders, poets, innovators, and possess a keen desire to learn. The photos below depict ASYV students, particularly from the family that I mentor. These are new students at ASYV, but their faces and smiles show hope and strength. Kwibuka may be a time to remember the past, but these are the faces of the future.